Aliens Crashed in My Back Yard by Mike Van Horn

Author:Mike Van Horn [Horn, Mike Van]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Galaxy Tall Tales, imprint of The Business Group Publications
Published: 2019-02-02T00:00:00+00:00

21. Shaggy Dog Story

On the way back, I needed to go by a store, and I stopped at a city park in San Rafael to use the facility. This late in the evening it looked deserted. The restrooms were up against a wooded hill. Breadbox was fascinated by the playground equipment. There’s a spaceship toy for kids to climb on, and she had to check that out. Then she wanted to crawl through the tunnel—like a big section of culvert. I avoided even thinking about her wanting to try the swings. Yikes, how would we do that?

When I used the restroom, I was curious about the extension cord plugged into the outlet that was trailing into the shrubbery behind it.

I should have known! A shaggy guy came ambling out of the bushes. “Hey! Don’t unplug my cord! Got the TV connected to that!”

After a momentary fear of being accosted, I recovered and made nice. “Sounds like you got pretty fancy digs here! What kind of reception do you get?”

“Well, it’s not too bad here as long as I don’t get hassled! The rent is right. TV don’t matter; I got DVDs.” He was pretty proud of himself. “Say, what kind of dog is that you’ve got over there? I was watching it run around!”

“Yeah… it’s one of those… shaggy… afghan… sheep hounds! It’s a rescue animal. I want to get it acclimated out here when other people are not around. So, don’t get too close, okay?” Strike 2!

Next I stopped at the 7-11 to pick up some half-and-half for the morning. Man, late at night that place is like the Star Wars Bar! I figured Breadbox would fit right in, but I implored her to stay in the back of the Jeep, covered up. But not quite covered up enough, because she attracted the attention of a woman sitting on the curb who might already have been communing with beings from outer space, from the way she looked.

Just as I came out of the store, she was edging up close, poking at Breadbox with a stick. I tried to get between her and the Jeep, and she said, “Sheeeeyit! What you got under that blanket, girl?”

“Hey hey, calm down! Halloween’s coming up. It’s for my kid’s costume. Don’t tell anybody, okay?”

All right. Three close scrapes. When are we going to go public? I saw I had to get together with my posse and talk about how to bring my friend out of the closet.

And of course, that means laying the whole story out there for the world. I can’t keep this a secret forever. I got the willies! Bad.

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